A webcomic where everyone's head is a square-based pyramid. Every Thursday!

Cast: Chapter One


1. The Lorenz Family

The Lorenz family consists of parents Marinee and Touman, and their children Dromie, Cardamom, Ruthel, and other "misc" members.

Little is learned in Chapter One about this young nuclear family, other than their living in relative middle-class comfort, with Touman a longtime employee of Verticality Inc., and Marinee self-employed.

In Chapter One, the family celebrate Dromie's birthday, giving the toddler a small, handheld fan to blow out the candles of the strictly performative cake.
The Lorenz family from Vulgar Vulgar

Dromie Lorenz from Vulgar Vulgar2. Dromie Lorenz

BIRTH DATE: 05/14/04

Dromie Lorenz is the youngest member of the Lorenz family, who is born by Caerean section at the beginning of Chapter One -- with an apex-centred c-sectional fissure, or a crack in a Citizen's head hardware. Dromie is (as of Chapter One) too young to have a Truth Value (the number denoting a Citizen's software, anatomy and opportunities), but is troublesome, acting out as Marinee tries to insert a charger, and fighting Cardamom and Ruthel over The Projector Cat.

Dromie starts attending St. Isidore's Community School mid-chapter and is immediately confused by its classes, especially Theological Evolutionary Science (taught partly by Boole.exe). However, with a little bit of Touman's help (see below), the young student manages to bypass the school's rigourous exams (but not after "punching" Boole.exe and being caught for cheating).

Reaching Graduation Ten, Dromie learns more about the changes belonging to either Truth Value, something that leads to a small outburst that seperates Dromie from the rest of the class, and piques the interest of Tavine Kepler.
Dromie doesn't experience these changes at the same pace as the other students at St. Isidore's. At the end of Chapter One, Dromie is assailed by a group of students figureheaded by Tavine. Dromie fights back, but is quickly overwhelmed.

Touman Lorenz from Vulgar Vulgar3. Touman Lorenz

BIRTH DATE:15/15/70

Touman Lorenz is Marinee's husband and Dromie's father. He has been employed by Verticality Inc. his entire working life.

Trained for research and idea-generation, his magnum opus is the (Lorenz) Stormcloud Hub, a massive computer meant to compensate for the ill-effects of Verticality's bionic enhancements (mainly the, y'know, pyramids).

The powers that be call it unsustainable. Touman is demoted, now working in bellies of the Verticality machines. He continues to make a good life for himself and his family, but remains bitter of the system that made a fool of him.

Marinee Lorenz from Vulgar Vulgar4. Marinee Lorenz

BIRTH DATE: 20/03/74

Marinee is Touman's wife and Dromie's mother. She is self-employed, but also bears the most responsibility for their children's upbringing.

Their youngest, Dromie, has been the worst-behaved of them all. She is scared by the vulgar images that the child draws on its face during a particularly heated moment, but can't help but defend Dromie, even after beig caught out for cheating in school.

After all, kids are supposed to act out, right?

Projector Cat from Vulgar Vulgar5. The Projector Cat

The Projector Cat is literally a pet project of Touman's, constructed from the old handheld projector he used to use for work. Now it belongs to Dromie, having been visciously fought for (there was hitting). While walking to school, Dromie discovers that some of the Projector Cat's functions are password-protected, but can't crack it.

Later, Touman helps Dromie to pass St. Isidore's exams by recoding the Projector Cat's CPU, allowing it to answer any question Bool.exe poses.

Boole.exe from Vulgar Vulgar6. Boole.exe

Boole.exe is an educational software created by Verticality Inc., used in St. Isidore's to teach Theological Evolutionary Science. It is in essence an extension of the historical figure, George Boole, but warped for use in teaching the subject.

The actual writings of Boole (see here for "An Investigation of the Laws of Thought") are used to justify the teachings in the class, although his logic doesn't really match the original Boole's.

His main method of teaching is to recite painfully long quotes before launching a question on the unsuspecting student.

The Education! Family from Vulgar Vulgar7. The Education! Family

The Education! Family feature in a short edutainment documentary that Dromie's sex-ed class watch, consisting of Kiddo, Dad and Mom. Kiddo's parents answer all of the kid's questions about what it means to be either a Nought or a One (the two Truth Values of modern society). The film is also used to advertise a body-monitoring software.

Dromie's classmates launch into private chat, either reacting to or ignoring the documentary. The squeamish members of the class blot out the anatomical images using the chat function.

It terrifies Dromie.

Naithanzer Descar from Vulgar Vulgar8. Naithanzer Descar

BIRTH DATE: 26/10/04

Naithanzer features rather silently in Chapter One, as a One who developed prematurely compared to other students, and reacted similarly to Dromie after watching the Education! documentary.

Naithanzer joins Tavine in attacking Dromie, but not without warning the kid (one the fight ends) not to fight the changes to come.

9. Tavine Kepler

Tavine Kepler from Vulgar Vulgar
BIRTH DATE: 04/01/05

Feautes briefly as a youngster watching the Educaition! documentary, but quickly grows into a domineering One that commands St.Isidore's bully-group.

He makes short work of Dromie at the end of Chapter One, his physical attacks accompanied by some unsettling remarks of looking forward to seeing whether Dromie becomes a Nought or a One.